"Virtually Busted" is an interesting story.
Drawing upon the fact that many men overstate their appearance when using cyberspace, it
has our hero (if you can call him that) inventing a whole new virtual reality experience.
He is the typical geek and uses his limited social skills to woo his on-line
girlfriend. Unfortunately, these skills are none too good and his plan of changing
his girl into one of his dreams ultimately backfires. He should have picked a
less bright girl.
The pace is nice and you are carried from scene to scene. There is not too much geek
language and the first virtual meeting is touching. The end, although predictable, was
fitting and very descriptive. Im glad Im not that horny, at least I think I
am. A nit pick is how will Cindy be able to pass the invention as her own, but I do tend
to dive deep into the workings of stories and I shouldn't let factual difficulties get in
the way of a good story. And it is a good story.
Moving on to "Just a Little Experiment." First, Id like to ask a
question. Whats the phone number and when can I start? Okay thats two
questions, but Id really like to get on that program.
This type of drug testing goes on all the time, so there is a solid foundation to build
on. Add to that the fact that few people actually read the papers they sign; just thinking
of the money, and you have the story. The icing on the cake is the revenge she extracts
from her former buddies. Very, very descriptive, I even picked up a few tips that I will
try out later. The pictures just add flesh to the bones and help the imagination along a
tad. The scene after the final transition was a bit limp in my view. I probably would have
ranted a bit longer, but its only a very minor point in an otherwise fine story.
I did feel slightly sorry for her victims, sorry, former buddies, but they did enjoy
themselves, didn't they? I know that Natalie did and thats all that counts.
Well written and well thought out, I would recommend both of the stories for your
enjoyment. I hope the author keeps adding to our site.