Dees contribution to the story archive is a four part, as yet
unfinished story, entitled, "Mothers Daughter." The protagonist, Dave,
finds himself, unwittingly, the solution to a desire of a former high school classmate for
a daughter. Dee uses her excellent talent for descriptive detail to lay out the change in
Dave as he becomes Melissa. Dee does have a flair for painting pictures with words that in
and of themselves make this story worth a read.
"Dave? Dave? Show yourself. I know youre in there somewhere!"
And theres the major problem with the four parts of "Mothers
Daughter" so far, where has Dave gone? Without him this becomes a lesbian domme
story, not a bad one by any means but lacking the single major device of TG fiction, i.e.;
he becomes a she in some form and, more importantly, knows it. Dee does have moments when
she has Dave remember, and be appalled by what hes become, but its an aside
that has no bearing on the his current embodiment, Melissa. In fact, they are used to
encourage the Melissa to rid herself of all thoughts of Dave. Thus she has a life and
thoughts of her own, unimpeded or influenced in any way by Dave and intends to stay that
way. As most of us are "Daves" we have less to connect us with the new main
character now except as outside observers.
What we get for the remainder of the story is a lot of self description of a teenage
girl going through the trials of puberty and some hot lesbian sex scenes. Dees
talent for description serves her well here.
The images added to parts 3 and 4 appear to have the authors(?) face cut and
pasted onto Melissas body which would be more compelling if Dave was an
active partner in the Melissa character and he saw himself in her. A strange dichotomy of
written imagery versus visual imagery that may or may not add to the enjoyment of the
story for the reader.
The original premise, established in the opening part, of Dave being transformed by
magical means into teenage Melissa had great promise (and perhaps could yet be
resurrected) but by part 2 the promise is broken. Dave sinks into the background with
hardly a whimper and the TG element of this story sinks with him. From then on its
"I Was a Teenage Lesbian Love Slave" and if thats your cup of tea take a
pekoe. Those of us oolong for something more will have to hope Dee brings her descriptive
talents to bear on bringing Dave back in the future.